Last week, I finally received confirmation of my next posting. It’s been a long journey of quiet waiting and trusting in His Providence.
After such a long stint in MOE HQ, many are surprised to hear that I am returning to be a teacher. Indeed, the reality of it hasn’t really sunk in for me yet. Perhaps it will only hit me in the first week as I face actual students again.
This decision to return to school has taken me a lot of courage. My previous experience of teaching was filled with a lot of precious memories with colleagues and students, but I also can’t quite forget the absolute exhaustion that was a daily affair, the constant headaches, flus and body aches, the total impossibility of having a social life during the week, and always having an incomplete to-do list at the back of my mind. And now I’m returning to all that as a mother, with two kids of my own to care for as well.
It would have been a lot easier to try and find a way to stay in HQ and hang on to the more family-friendly possibilities there. But I cannot forget that at the core of my very first calling to teach is the youth of our future generations. I won’t get all altruistic about this because I’m not sure how much I will really be able to contribute, having been away from the classroom for so long, and now returning determined to ‘protect whatever I need to’ (haha random quote from episode two of DoTS) in terms of the time and head space I need to reserve to care for my family. It’s simple. God has called, and I will follow.
And that’s how I came to surrender the entire process of finding a school to His will. During open posting, I sussed out whatever opportunities I could and went for the interviews. When those fell through because I was honest about wanting to put my family needs first in this season of my life, I was at peace to go ahead with the closed posting process. Many who had previous bad experiences with HR decisions advised me to do more to try and secure a comfortable place for myself, if possible. However, as no further opportunities presented themselves, I resolved to be at rest and continue to trust God in His goodness and faithfulness. When I was praying about work matters after having Noah, He clearly directed me to put family first and that meant trying for a part-time arrangement as far as possible. That direction hasn’t changed, so I believe that He will continue to supply either the environment I need to continue with that arrangement, or He will give me the fortitude, flexibility and wisdom to adapt to adverse circumstances. Of course, I am hoping fervently for the former.
The posting I received certainly affirms the restedness I had in Him. The school is neither too far nor too near my home, has familiar faces among its staff, and has a good reputation regarding its students. An ex-colleague who now works there told me that ‘we are blessed’ to have found a place there.
I guess only time will tell whether these first impressions are to be believed, but for now, I am content. God honors my decision to put my husband and children first, but He hasn’t forgotten who I was before my life was consumed by this parenting stuff. His calling for me hasn’t changed, I just have to wait and see how He’s working it out in my life.